5 SURPRISING CELEBS THAT WERE GOTH (AT ONE POINT), TOO!

Teens in 2000 to 2009: IT’S NOT A PHASE, MOM

2019: … *Spotify Year In Review is filled with all the same music*

Regardless if you’re one to still let your freak flag aesthetically fly, or keep it reined in to your playlists & choice of nail polish, the fact is we’re in exceptionally good (& large!) company when it comes to the roster of current- & former-goths.

Hopping onto the bandwagon for shallow reasons was always one thing, but I am a HUGE believer that any genuine alternative “phase” (not a phase) is something that potentially sticks with you forever. 

Time is a thing. So eventually you grow out of the angsty teenage years, set sail into the workforce, evolve your style & may or may decide to bring the aesthetic along with you. But even if you trade in your blue hair for blowouts, & industrial dancing cred for an ergonomic office chair, it doesn’t mean that part of you doesn’t continue to play a role.

Way back when in those god-awful grade-school years, we were all drawn to whatever scene for a reason. Whether it was the music, the movies, the themes or philosophies held by its people, there were crystal-clear reasons why your little black sheep heart chose the pop-cultural path it did. And here you are, metamorphosed into the slightly less fledgling of a freak that stands today!

No doubt, it’s been a wild ride. Although I think it’s important to stay true to & relish in the things you KNOW have always stuck near & dear to your heart. No matter when you discovered them…& no matter what type of highly questionable hairstyle you inevitably sported at the time (did I mention we’ve all teeth-clenchingly been there?).

Which is why my rant is officially over & it’s now time to remember that celebrities are hilariously no different. 

Seriously! When you think “goth” celebs, of course there’s Kelly, Winona, Taylor Momsen – you know, the ~obvious~ suspects who’ve never fully abandoned their dark-friendly looks. Then, there are the A-listers like Taylor Swift who have ONE old MySpace picture with dark hair that the Internet freaks out about & claims it was a “it’s not a phase, mom” phase. Ugh, insane. 

BUT those aside, I wanted to pull the curtain back on a few of the more unsuspecting peeps. Like the ones you never would have guessed they took their looks to the dark side at one point or another.

Because as I mentioned, we’ve all teeth-clenchingly been there !!!

So let’s begin:

CHRISTINA HENDRICKS

Image Source

Office Manager of a 1960s ad agency is a bit of a pivot from the obligatory brooding-teen-goth-in-the-woods pic, but hey, she undoubtably rocked it! From Mad Men to Good Girls, to one of the voices in Toy Story 4 (none of which I’ve actually seen but a lot of people seem to like !) Christina Hendricks has definitely come a long way from her jet black-laden days.

ELIZABETH HURLEY

Image Source

Definitely a punk if there ever was one, Elizabeth Hurley spent quite a time raging against the cultural grain, without question. Of course, we all know the British bombshell from The Royals, Austin Powers & ~most importantly~ Gossip Girl, but before her modeling debut, she was all about this bold, badass & gravity-defying look.

MELISSA MCCARTHY

Image Source

So even though Melissa McCarthy somehow went from cheerleader to mega-goth overnight, we have to at least give her props for some apparently major commitment. According to her husband & fellow actor/comedian Ben Falcone, the Gilmore Girls & Bridesmaids alumna donned a “really scary” kabuki-makeup/blue-hair/black-coat-in-the-summer situation throughout some of her high school years. So wish we had a pic of that!

CATE BLANCHETT

Image Source

Who doesn’t love a gal with a good buzz cut, am I right? Probably taking the cake of most unrecognizable is the too-many-roles-to-count superstar Cate Blanchett. Citing her pale skin as one of the biggest things she celebrated during the time (girl, we feel), she proudly represented the Aussie goths & now has a million prestigious acting awards to show for it.

ANDREW YANG

Image Source

And arguably one of the most surprising of them all, the prez candidate himself- Andrew Yang. Revealing his truth as a full-on “ex-goth” via Twitter earlier in 2019, he included his fave bands of the time & a few pics of the long(ish), greasy hair. A few months later another pic surfaced showing a pretty hefty dose of guyliner as well. But apparently that one was just a Halloween costume.

Embarrassing baby goth photos = SO much to love.

We wouldn’t be where we are now without them. So what’s the best-worst fashion memory you have?

Mine was definitely the great “scene hair” pandemic of 2009…

xxAA

((additional feature image source))

THE OTHER F WORD, COMING-OF-AGE & WHY WE HAVE ALL THE FEELS ABOUT IT

Whenever it comes to TV & movies, I definitely have a knack for being ‘that guy’ who’s late to the party.

I mean, you keep up with your favorites & have a finger on the pulse of what’s new. Though with the ‘80s hair-level volume of content being produced nowadays – who POSSIBLY has time to hit it all?!

But that aside, the crazy thing is always when you’ve heard of something & KNOW you’re going to be all about it. Yet, it still (for whatever reason) can take you awhile to actually get around to it.

My most recent case in point: The Other F Word.

It’s also currently available on Hulu!

You’ve probably heard of or seen it by now because see above: always late to the party. BUT for those who may not be so familiar, The Other F Word is a documentary that debuted in 2011, highlighting a mind-blowing variety of punk-rock icons-turned-fathers who share their ultimate truth about what it’s like to now be the authority they built a career raging against.

And yes – it is absolutely everything you want it to be. Equal parts hilarious as it is heart-wrenching, might I add.

From the hysterical accounts of Mark Hoppus & Fat Mike, to the heart-breaking tales of Duane Peters & Art Alexakis, let me just stress that you WILL feel all of the feels. As I still am about five solid weeks later.

But you know, that’s what’s so incredible about it. 

It’s no accident why coming-of-age has always been one of the most interesting (and hard-hitting) themes to a lot people since forever. Mainly because that long-awaited juncture where you officially cross over from youth into adulthood? It doesn’t really exist. At least, not in one fell swoop moment.

It just happens. For some, in a way that feels normal and manageably gradual. And for others, it hits like a ton of bricks.

Just like the film’s flagship anthem, Against Me!’s “I Was A Teenage Anarchist”. Which – fast forward to the other night when we got to catch the second half of their two-night concert series rocking out White Crosses and Transgender Dysphoria Blues in their entireties – of course they played. And once again, I cried. Kevin cried. The crowd cried! Because that’s what all of these feels still cause today. Just like they did when we were 16. Just like they will when we’re 60.

And just like they did when we were watching The Other F Word. All in the best way possible.

So the next time you’re in the market for something that can both uplift and pierce your soul at the stunningly same time, look no further than this hugely underrated, absolute gem of a doc. 

Just be sure to keep the tissues close by.

xxAA

Elements of feature image from Amazon

EVERYONE RELAX, IT: CHAPTER TWO JUST MIGHT BE THE MOST FEARLESS KING ADAPTATION YET (SPOILER-FREE)

For horror nerds, this past week marked a much-anticipated end to an agonizing wait.  

It’s been two years since Andy Muschietti’s IT (2017) floated into our hearts – and nightmares. Especially since it also went on to become the highest grossing horror film of all time after dethroning the then-long-reigning champion, The Exorcist.  But for many (me included), the recent release of It: Chapter Two marks an even longer awaited milestone.  Like a comet passing Earth or cryptid encounter – this is a rarely seen event: an actually accurate adaptation of a Stephen King story.  

Please, please, please – Hollywood – don’t fuck this part up!

Image Source: IMDB/Brooke Palmer/Warner Brothers Entertainment

It’s obvious that even the most casual horror fan remembers the beloved IT made-for-TV miniseries from 1990 that has become a cult favorite.  And while that adaptation was an honorable attempt to tell the 1,300-page horror opus, the fact that the ABC network produced and broadcasted the two-night event pretty well guaranteed that many of the darker, violent, and more sexual elements of the story wouldn’t make the cut.  

Now, don’t get me wrong – Tim Curry as Pennywise will never be forgotten.  At the very least, that element of terror from King’s story was definitely retained in the miniseries.  Hell, it’s the biggest thing most horror fans remember about it! How badass his take on the infamous dancing clown truly is.  

Tim Curry as Pennywise | Image Source: IMDB/Warner Brothers Television/ABC

But when it comes to anyone that’s read the book, it’s a little different. Those readers don’t walk away from the ending only retaining the scary parts—they remember the Losers. They remember all the heart that King poured into his prose, literally hundreds of pages developing the soul-bonds of the Losers.  Bonds that made them magical.  Magical enough to defeat “The Eater of Worlds”.   

Twice, technically.  

These kids become your friends. Because these kids become you. Each one a reflection of real-life childhood love, fear, aspirations, and trauma that each one of us can relate to. And to their credit, the young adult cast from the ‘90s version is incredible.  Honestly, both adaptations nailed the first, adolescent-focused timeline; but in regard to the OG miniseries, its portions featuring the adults unfortunately seemed to fall flat in a lot of people’s eyes.  

Well, almost all of the adults.

Point being when it comes to telling the latter part of Bill, Bev, Ben, Richie, Eddie, Mike and Stan’s story, the struggle has always been real.  Since in the book – things get…weird.  

Like real weird.  On a cosmic/mystic level.  

So viewers who only know the story from watching the miniseries probably don’t know how meta King really gets. Which makes any kind of authentic adaptation for the masses damn-near impossible.  

Although, that’s what separates Muschietti’s films from other Stephen King remakes of the past.  

IT has never really had an accurate cinematic telling.  And I can already hear the outcry from the T.C. Pennywise fans, but we – the horror community – needed this!  We pined for Chapter Two to not only be weird (I’m talking Ritual of Chud), but that it be scarier than the first film, too.  

And I’ll be damned if the movie doesn’t deliver on all of these points.  

Image Source: Twitter

In the same way that Chapter One’s cast made the world fall in love with the young Losers’ Club, Chapter Two only reinforces that affection.  Seriously, the adult cast could not have done a better job of honoring their younger counterparts as well as the characters from the original page. 

And this is why the Muschietti films just might be the best Stephen King adaptation to date.  I know – bold words.  But anyone who doesn’t identify as a “Constant Reader” probably won’t know the author’s deep, dark secret…

The King of Horror is a great, big softy. (If you don’t believe me, just check out his Instagram).  

https://www.instagram.com/p/B2F1ZLDJDrL/

A sweet-hearted nerd with a passion for standing up against bullies of all shapes, sizes and Lovecraftian form.  This truth is something that Hollywood sadly doesn’t always capture; and instead, just milks the creepy while skipping the heart and soul. (I’m looking at you Dreamcatcher!)

Though to be fair, Stand By Me and The Shawshank Redemption are beloved by the mainstream; however, neither are particularly horrific in their plot.  Dark?  For sure. But not night sweat-inducing by any means.  

But IT… 

IT is different.  If any one book of his could be used to describe his entire thematic life’s work, IT could easily be the top contender. The imagery is true stuff of horror: children being eaten alive by a shapeshifting monster with a million-year-old backstory.  Jeez, that’s hardcore.  And on the flip side, the prose equally captures the joy of life-long friendships, the pain of navigating young adulthood and how some of that trauma can sometimes haunt us long into adulthood. Whether we realize it or not.

Embed from Getty Images

Which is why, regardless of the Rotten Tomato score or the number of IMDB stars the movie ultimately ends up with, Andy Muschietti and his creative team should be proud. IT: Chapter Two successfully walks a razor-sharp tight rope between these contrasting emotional elements from King’s novel, quite possibly making it the most successful Stephen King film to-date.  

You’ll scream, you’ll laugh, and you’ll cry.  But honestly, what more could you ask for from the film version of the greatest horror novel of all time? 

Although just to be safe, I still wouldn’t watch it alone.

xxKF 

(((Feature Image Source: IMDB/Warner Brothers Entertainment/New Line)))

WHITE CLAW BLACKBERRY-LIME SCONES

Myyyyyyyyyy WHITE CLAW BRINGS ALL THE BOYS TO THE YARD!

Woah…simmering down. What I actually meant to say is happy September, my party people! 

It’s crazy to think that our fun-in-the-sun weather has already come and gone. Though with that it’s only natural we say sayonara to summer, and most importantly, usher in the fall-filled, only-55-days-until-Halloween kind of vibes.

But since we’ll all be wishing for warmer temps come the onslaught of snow (& for the West Coast- anything below 70 degrees) soon enough, it’s also fair we give this sunny season the worthy farewell it deserves. Which means concocting something fresh out of a British millennial’s dreams, obviously.

That’s right, I’m talking about White Claw SCONES!

In addition to all the seltzer-hounding bros out there, inspiration for this recipe came from the patron saint of sandwich finesse himself: Chef Jeff Mauro! One morning while watching my lifeblood (A.K.A. Food Network’s The Kitchen), Jeff totally dropped the mic when he intro’ed the concept of scones made with Prosecco. Revolutionary – I know, I know.

So in the shadows of this year’s scorching #HotGirlSummer, the idea came to me like a prophecy. Instead of stopping at just Prosecco, why not go for the gold—the WHITE CLAW gold. 

After all, there ain’t no laws when you’re drinking claws, right? (Edit: no)

(There are definitely still laws)

Jokes aside, this combo is fire. Seriously, 7-Up biscuits are a totally fine start; but why not go even further with replacing some of our baking liquid with the crisp, bubbly goodness the world has randomly just now discovered? 

So whether it’s a DIY brunch or something to tag-team with your morning coffee, you’ll find these flaky babies are about to become your new go-to treat.

// DIRECTIONS //

++ Preheat your oven to 400℉ to make sure it’s nice and hot, then line a baking sheet with parchment paper and set it to the side.

++ Place the cubed butter into the freezer for a few minutes before you start the dough. (Just like pastry dough, keeping your ingredients super cold will make for exceptionally flaky scones – I even popped my White Claw in the freezer, too)

++ Meanwhile, chop up your blackberries and leave no piece of lime unzested.

++ In a large mixing bowl, combine the flour, sugar, salt and baking powder and mix with a wooden spoon.

++ Remove the chilled butter from the freezer and add it to the dry ingredients. Cut the butter into the dry mix using a pastry blender (or two forks) until it’s about the size of a peas.

++ In a separate bowl, add the buttermilk, White Claw, vanilla extract and splash of heavy cream (only if you already have it) and whisk together. Then, ((gradually)) add the wet ingredients to the dry. Add the chopped blackberries, lime zest, splash of lime juice and pinch of white pepper, then ((carefully)) fold it all in. 

++ Your dough should quickly start to come together, but if you find it to be too dry, add additional touches of White Claw. BUT ALSO FIRST PLEASE NOTE this is a critical step—you do not, I repeat, DO NOT want to overwork your dough or add too much liquid. Scone dough should be on the drier side, rather than wet and sticky. 

((For this round, I accidentally got heavy handed with the additional White Claw. But I promise, it wasn’t on purpose – so I won’t tell if you don’t))

++ Once the dough is an optimum consistency, plop it onto a lightly floured cutting board and delicately roll it out into a circle. About 1 to 1.5 inches thick. Cut into 8 triangles and place each on the parchment-lined baking sheet.

++ Bake for 16 to 18 minutes until delectably golden brown. Then remove and let cool on a wire rack for a few minutes before enveloping.

Now, the other best part of this recipe is that you can also completely customize it to your favorite flavor!  I’m thinking black cherry/dark chocolate & vanilla, mango/white chocolate & mint, raspberry/lemon & lavender and grapefruit/ginger & a pinch of cayenne. The possibilities are truly endless.

(Just never mind the current nationwide shortage)

But either way, this is where we end things in the only way that feels right: Yee Claw!

Enjoy xxAA

WELCOME TO MSFT LIVING

To all the misfits and mystics;

Oddballs and outcasts; 

Freaks, geeks, goths and punks;

Star seeds, old souls, boundary-pushers and ragers against the grain.

To anyone who’s ever felt out of place in your place: hello! And welcome home.

A home of culture and creativity infused with unconventional design and inspiration, now officially known as MSFT Living.

And we have to admit, it’s been a pretty long time in the making. But to finally be launched, live and ready to thrive – we couldn’t be more thrilled to have you all along for the wild ride.

xxAA